A Day Full Of Silly Jokes And Crazy Laughs

I'm not a big fan of April Fool's Day just because some people take it to the extreme. Silly puns, on the other hand, are my favorite thing in the whole wide world. What kind of puns, you may ask?

Out of all the inventions in the last 100 years, the dry erase board is probably the most remarkable.

See what they did there?

Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot!

Yep, I went there!

I scraped my elbow digging for gold. Just a miner injury.

A cashew and a pistachio threw a party. It was nuts.

There is a fine line between numerator and denominator. Only a fraction of people will get that.

What do dentists call their x-rays? Tooth pics.

Tongue twister champion arrested. He was given a tough sentence.

Two bed bugs fell in love. They're getting married in the spring.

Milk is the fastest liquid on earth. It's pasteurize before you see it.

I'm trying to make a good tree pun, but I'm stumped.

Where do you learn how to make the best banana splits? At sundae school.

If a plant is sad, do other plants photosympathize with it?

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

I dig, you dig, we dig, he dig, she dig, they dig ... it's not a beautiful poem but it's very deep.

A bike in town keeps running me over. It's a vicious cycle.

Have you heard the latest rumor about butter? Never mind, I shouldn't spread it.

People are usually shocked when they learn I'm not a very good electrician.

My recliner and I go way back.

Just learned they're not going to make yardsticks any longer.

The man who fell into the upholstery machine is fully recovered.

Thank you ... I'll be here all weekend. Feel free to share these frequently and with a smile.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Recovering An Old Card Table And Making It Usable Again

Image
This card table recover project has been on my to-do list for months. I've been using it as my workspace in the craft room for quite some time, and it sees a lot of abuse. Here it is now, with a neutral cover on it so I can take better pictures for my tutorials. There were dents and dings in the old blue covering from metal tools. And yes, I've used my embossing heat tool on it several times, leaving pretty good scars. The padding underneath the blue cover also made it difficult to keep paper crafts flat when adhering them together, so it was time for something new. That's where a simple vinyl tablecloth comes in handy. The process to recover the table is pretty simple, but I learned a couple of lessons the hard way. I share them with you now. First, don't do this on any surface but a carpet. I tried it on the deck int he sunshine to get better pictures, but all it did was tear up the cover. Second, get a second pair of hands to help you kee
Read more

Simple DIY Beaded Keychains

Image
We're having so much fun putting together goodie bags and door prizes for our upcoming ladies retreat at the church. So many of our ladies have donated craft supplies, decorations, time and energy to treat our visitors to an amazing time. These keychains are just one of the gifts some of the attendees will find in their bags. All you need to make them are a variety of beads, some fairly thin yet sturdy cord and a jump ring. Cut a length of cord, fold it in half and string it through the jump ring. String matching beads on both sides. And tie it off with a double knot. So simple, yet so pretty. Here's another variation: Cut a length of cord, fold it in half and thread it through a jump ring. Tie one or two beads on one side and tie it off with a knot. Make the other side longer with additional letters and beads before tying it off. Make a variety of lengths, colors, patterns and phrases so no two are alike.
Read more

Debilitating Disappontment

The things of this life tend to disappoint us. People aren't who we'd like them to be, events we'd hoped for never occur and things we'd expected to happen in a certain way never come to pass. I've tried relying on everything else in this life - relationships, career, better finances. When we look to mankind for answers or for hope, we will surely be disappointed. Our own misconceptions of life's circumstances leads us down a long, dreary path. What we plan and see inside our head doesn't always match what others see, or what may actually be reality. Looking into ourselves for "clarity" directs us straight to depression and failure. Have you ever heard yourself say, "I couldn't care less" and truly meant it? Having confidence in our own power to change our outlook means that we care more about the circumstances themselves rather than how to grow as Christian women. God is the only unchanging factor in our uncertain world. Focusing on
Read more